Men spend an enormous amount of time trying to upgrade their Swag but beyond the first date, Swag is not a major factor that sophisticated women seek. Of course every woman expects her man to be attractive but he can be attractive and still lack Class. Attraction is good to get her attention but it will take more than fresh styles to keep her attention.
It does, however, depend on the type of women a man is interested in dating too. Ladies without class are obviously not interested in a man with class. But, there are ladies who want more and expect more from the potential love of her life. So, if he wants to last longer than a few dates the elements of his Swagger will have to evolve.
What women hate more than anything is a man with too many Lacks. Don’t get it twisted. Not Cadillacs. Women don’t want a man who is hopeless in several key areas.
LACK OF EDUCATION
To keep a woman with sophistication a man will have to be able to hold a conversation about more than Sports and Pop Culture. It’s common to talk about the latest song that’s your jam or who did a great dunk in last night’s NBA game but unless she is a Sports Fanatic like him, she expects a man to have a broad opinion about National Issues, Spirituality, Economics, International Culture, and even Social Issues.
Young men are graduating from High School completely oblivious to world issues. Because young girls don’t demand a higher grade of conversation they don’t even have a reason to stay abreast of what is going on globally. The type of women they date are usually women with the same level of interest. Sophisticated women will expect more.
Women with class don’t want to have to order for a man because he can’t pronounce the food titles on the menu. It’s not that he’s dumb but rather he just hasn’t been exposed to many restaurants with more than common dishes on the menu. She doesn’t want to always know everything about every subject. She wants to surround herself with a man who has more than just the common knowledge of the world. He has to be able to inspire her and make her hungry for more of his thoughts. She wants a man who will broaden her mind. She doesn’t want to always broaden his.
LACK OF INTEGRITY
Women who lack sophistication and class will not expect a man to have much of it. However, Women of great Standard and Principal will only accept men of the same class. She will expect him to demonstrate positive Principals and Morals.
His views must mirror Truth. She expects to see Honor displayed in his daily dealings. His perspectives must amplify a buried Wisdom that she sees embedded in his heart. She wants to know his word has merit and there are values about himself that he is willing to die to protect.
She doesn’t expect him to always be right but real Integrity is admitting when he is wrong and making an honest commitment to improve. His daily efforts of improvement are visible to her as she observes him. She notices his mistakes bother him and impact him more than the people who witnessed them. It serves as a reminder to her that he respects discipline and won’t settle for mediocrity. Not even from himself.
The worst thing a man can be is classless. He must have a reasonable grain of Confidence in him which shows up when he walks and is echoed when he talks. The walk and the talk just amplifies the stature which is hidden within his heart.
LACK OF AMBITION
In relationships, there will be good times as well as bad times. Some times the money will be lucrative and sometimes the money will be scarce. The sophisticated woman does not want a man who will crumble in the low season. She wants a man who is not intimidated by a challenge. She expects him to Rise Beyond Tolerance.
Sexy to her is a man with a defiant attitude towards anything rising against them. He refuses to go down. The Gladiator that he is won’t allow him to accept defeat so easily. Opposition is motivation to him.
She expects him to have a plan. If she can’t see his Vision she also can’t see where she fits in his future. His vision needs to be shared with her. In this manner he doesn’t gain a woman. He gains a Life-Mate to Co-Exist Him. He can’t be weak. No woman wants a man who gives up easily. She wants a man who doesn’t know how to stop fighting.
Laziness will run just about any woman away from a man but there are some “Chickenheads” who don’t mind a man laying on the sofa all day while she pays for everything. This WILL NOT happen with a Sophisticated woman. Even if she has to pay for everything, the lazy man will not lay around her house all day. He’ll have to do it at his own house. It’s just not attractive and it will quickly turn her off.
Men are supposed to be hunters. Not necessarily for food but hunters for opportunity. She expects him to always find a possible way to transition. Without ambition he’s a little boy with dreams to her. With ambition, she sees a man with potential.
LACK OF SPIRITUALITY
There is just something mysterious about a man who is Spiritual. He doesn’t have to be super religious with a memorization of every bible verse but most women want a reverent man.
If a man wants a woman to take him seriously, volunteer to go to church with her. She will begin thinking entirely good thoughts about him until he proves her otherwise. A man who wants to learn about God means he has respect for Humanity. Even if his interest isn’t God but rather Creation and Earth and Physics, she’ll respect that as well because at least his Faith disciplines him.
What she cares about most is that he believes in something. Sophisticated, Classy women do not want a man who doesn’t believe there is a Higher Power. She won’t always be able to see eye to eye with him. She knows this. But if she knows his Faith is important to him she knows it will also swing him back around to reality when he is lost.
She would like him to be a praying man. There is nothing wrong with a man who is unashamed to pray with his woman. She finds this attractive. The act alone demonstrates he is positioned and in line with God. It’s good for her to know when times are hard and the family is out of solutions that his Faith will be sufficient. If his plan is failing she finds security in knowing that he will turn to God to redirect himself.
LACK OF EMPLOYMENT
She’s not accepting a man who has no income. Not in this day and time. It’s just not going to happen. It’s one thing to be in transition but its another thing to become a slum. He has to bring something in. At least gas money. Peanut Butter and Jelly money. Tissue from Wal-Mart money.
A woman feels if a man doesn’t bring in any income at all then he is less than a man. It’s because the man is expected to carry the weight of the family. She doesn’t mind him making less than her. She doesn’t mind him making equal to her. She seriously has no problem with him making more than her. But making nothing at all is just flat out unacceptable.
As a matter of fact, he shouldn’t even be looking for a woman until he gets this problem solved. What gives a man Swagger is the confidence he has in himself as a provider. If a man can’t provide for himself what purpose does he have dragging some hopeful woman into his irresponsible path?
If he is in transition of course she will see his ambition and hold up him until he is back in position again, but only because she knows financial lack bothers him more than herself. When she sees him comfortable in a pool of nothing, first chance she gets she is hopping out of that water. It benefits no one involved.
Women must stop enabling men to be slums. A man needs to be pushed as much as he needs to be supported. Enabling him to be comfortable in lacks only continues a pattern of men who should be disqualified from having families and being supposed Heads of Households. When ladies begin to demand more from the men they date they will reap more from available prospects. Sophisticated Women expect a man she is seriously involved with to be a candidate who will possibly complete her life purpose. She is not going to settle for a man who is still incomplete as a man and has yet to even discover his own life purpose.